Romantic 12 Course Meal For Two at Home

General Tips

Start by picking a theme. That really focuses your search & decisions of what to make.
You want some flavors that recur in your meal, but you also want to avoid a meal that lacks variety.
I like to make everything myself due to dietary restrictions & interest, but you can definitely buy something for every single course premade from Trader Joe's.
Make a plan for prepping & cooking. I try to choose recipes that are as preppable as possible, so that I have as little to do during the actual meal as possible. I do not pre-cook meat.
If you want to do beverage pairings, consider them while choosing recipes. You don't need 12 separate drink pairings -- I typically do 4 max.
You don't have to be literal about the courses -- it's still a 12 course meal if you make it vegan & do something different for the fish / poultry / red meat courses. I still like starting from this list for inspiration.
Since you're just cooking small courses for two people, dishes that would be a bear to assemble at scale are a lot more doable!
My wife decided to add a bonus "baker's dozen" course -- a bread course after the salad. This gives me a nice break after I prepare 5/9 of the courses that require cooking on the day of, and it soaks up some of the alcohol.

Course Specific Tips

hors d'oeuvre

At my house, hors d'oeuvres are eaten on the couch before we truly sit down to the meal. Since they come first but you aren't busy eating while they cook, you have a bit more flexibility in terms of prepping / cooking. I prefer finger food. I also specifically pick something with the goal of satiating us through the salad course -- I try to keep most of the early courses light so we can properly enjoy the main courses, but being hangry is not romantic.

amuse-bouche

An amuse-bouche has two jobs: to show off, and to leave your mouth watering. I tend to prioritize the latter. In general, it should be 1-2 bites. This is THE place to get weird with it. One time I tried to make a savory macaron.

soup

I always make consomme. It has a super full-bodied flavor without the heaviness of a creamy soup. It's quite a bit of prep work, but the result is far superior to a normal broth in taste & appearance. You also will prep it almost entirely ahead of time -- all that's left the day of is heating it back up, a bit of seasoning to taste, and garnish!

When you look up how to make consomme, all you see is chicken and beef, but you can clarify ANY kind of broth! If you're making consomme with a nontraditional broth, I suggest using gelatin or agar clarification. I made a gelatin-clarified pumpkin consomme and it was amazing with such a concntrated pumpkin flavor that I hadn't predicted from the good-but-pedestrian broth.

appetizer

You have a lot of leeway with this course. Take inspiration from whatever your favorite appetizers are. Personally, I default to some type of crostini because it's easy, delicious, and versatile.

salad

The thing to remember is that this is a course, not a side or a meal. It has to hold up to the rest of the courses, but it doesn't need to be filling. I suggest starting with a homemade vinagrette and your favorite greens.

baker's dozen bonus course

It's bread. If one of you likes baking, it can be homemade; otherwise anything other than sandwich bread works. If you're using bread in any of your other courses, just use the same bread. The point is to take a break from cooking.

fish

I like to really feature the seafood I chose - just seared with some simple sides to complement it. Scallops with a vegetable puree are always a winner.

If you can't do seafood, here's some alternative suggestions:

a direct seafood alternative, such as mushroom scallops
use a different marine ingredient, like algae or seaweed, to maintain the seafood feel
These work best if you do them for all three fish/poultry/meat courses:

feature a vegetable/fruit/nut/mushroom in the same way you'd feature the fish
feature a non-meat protein in the same way you'd feature the fish

poultry

I like to really feature the poultry I chose with a pan sauce & simple side. I really like duck. I generally suggest something you can cook pretty quickly on the stovetop.

If you can't do meat/poultry, here's some alternative suggestions:

a dish/sauce that is typically made with poultry, with vegetables or a different protein - such as picatta or marsala
a dish that pairs well with typical poultry-paired wines
These work best if you do them for all three fish/poultry/meat courses:

feature a vegetable/fruit/nut/mushroom in the same way you'd feature the poultry
feature a non-meat protein in the same way you'd feature the poultry

palate cleanser

I always do sorbet here. You could buy sorbet, but I prefer to make something you couldn't just buy that goes perfectly with the rest of the courses. Sorbets with mint or ginger in the flavor profile work well for being palate cleansing and feeling grown up and fancy. I once chose a cucumber-mint sorbet as a fun princess diaries reference. Tip: for homemade sorbet, adding about 1 shot of vodka per quart of sorbet keeps it from getting too hard.

red meat

I like to really feature the meat I chose with a pan sauce & simple side. I suggest doing a small cut of meat such as medallions, to cook quickly.

If you can't do red meat, here's some alternative suggestions:

a second kind of poultry, presented differently to the first
whatever has the same emotional impact as steak for you
a dish that pairs well with typial red meat-paired wines
These work best if you do them for all three fish/poultry/meat courses:

feature a vegetable/fruit/nut/mushroom in the same way you'd feature the meat
feature a non-meat protein in the same way you'd feature the meat

cheese

Choose based on your theme or what you love. If you can't have dairy, I recommend fresh fruit or an interesting homemade pickle.

dessert

I suggest choosing something that feels very fancy but is also preppable. Creme brulee, panna cotta, and mousse all fit this bill.

mignardise

This ridiculous word refers to that little treat that comes with the bill sometimes, like the andes mint you used to get at olive garden. It should be bite-size finger food. Any kind of fancy candy or cookie works.

Beverage Pairing Options

Wine

Pros	Cons
Fancy & classic Tons of info on how to do it You might be using wine in some of the recipes anyway	With just two people, mutiple bottles is a lot of wine Buying multiple bottles of nice wine can get expensive

You can save money & buy less wine by choosing cans and 187ml bottles, and they still taste good.

Beer

Pros	Cons
You don't have to buy more than you need Still plenty of info on how to do it	Not as traditionally fancy or romantic IME, the kinds of beers that pair well are divisive

This is a good choice if you're a beer person, especially if you're a craft beer person.

Cocktails

Pros	Cons
If you have a stocked liquor cabinet, you don't have to buy anything You can make really tiny/weak cocktails and have specific pairings for every course	Hard to find information on how to pair People often to have strong opinions on spirits

This is a good choice if you love making cocktails. Cocktail pairings are really nontraditional, which could be something you're looking for.

Nonalcoholic

Pros	Cons
You're not going to get drunk Generally cheaper than alcohol	You're not going to get drunk Nonalcoholic options vary in quality & nicer ones are harder to find/more expensive/more effort

For nonalcoholic pairings, I would suggest homemade shrubs.